It's tough sending your kid off to college. We've spent nearly 19 years (well, if you want to get technical and count while he was in utero, I have spent more than 19 years) knowing where your kid is all the time, hearing about their day, and generally how they're doing. Then you're just supposed to....stop? It is really a lot to ask.
We dropped Reed off last Saturday. We've had a handful of text message exchanges with him, which is great, but we haven't spoken in a week now. While he's given us brief comments about some of the activities and his classes, we have no clue how he's doing. How is the roommate situation going? Is he getting enough to eat, and using his meal plan wisely? Has he met any new friends? Who's he going to meals with?
When Tod and I talked about our worries, he correctly pointed out that we're each worried most about the thing that was hardest for us in college. Tod is worried that Reed will be too homesick. I'm worried that he won't make friends and get involved.
I can only imagine what a culture shock it was for Tod when his parents put him on a plane to West Point (and he walked away from his parent to get on the plane, and didn't even look back at them, as his Mom always reminded him). He'd never even visited the school. And the Hudson Valley of New York couldn't be more different than southeastern Montana. He wrote lots of letters home (we have some in the basement, we gotta read through those things!). But ultimately he adjusted and made lifelong friends. No clue if Reed's feeling homesick...hopefully we will get to talk with him soon and try to gauge his mood.
My college experience was considerably shorter than Tod's, of course. Radford was overcrowded at the time, so they put me in a room with two other girls, though it wasn't built for that. And the two girls were best friends. Did I mention that they both also had been high school cheerleaders, and probably among the most popular at their high school in Woodbridge? Good times. They were nice enough to me, but the situation definitely made me a third wheel. I had also started dating the guy who would become my first husband (shocking, I know...I think the kids keep forgetting this fact about me) the summer before college, so my mind was also on home. I have been trying to remember details about my one semester of college, but I can't remember much at all, not even how drop off went! I am not sure I ever ate a meal in the cafeteria with anyone else, I only remember eating alone. And I definitely didn't talk to people in my classes. I did college all wrong. No wonder it didn't work out for me (well, it worked out in the end, but not at the time!). So my biggest fear is that Reed will stay in his room talking to his old friends over video games and never meeting new people at JMU or getting involved in any activities.
It's entirely possible that neither of these things will be problems for Reed, and he'll have some other issue altogether. Or maybe he'll have no issues! We are just hoping he will be safe and happy, and get the most out of his time in college. I know this is all the natural order of things, but that doesn't make it any easier!
No comments:
Post a Comment