In 2016, I learned that my GI Bill educations benefits were going to expire in 2018, so I started school at Capella University to earn a Phd in Information Technology. My Phd journey has overlapped with much of the kid's formative years. I started school in the Fall of 2016 and hope to finish in 2020. For Reed, that would be 7th through 11th Grades. For Amy, that would be 5th through 9th grades. Most of my evenings and many weekends from 2016-2020 have found me sitting in a corner with my laptop. I spent three weekends away for residency courses in Alexandra, VA, Dallas, TX, and Orlando, FL. Those trips would seem like business trips to the kids, while my time at home engrossed in my laptop I expect will have influenced the kids in some way. I hope they remember this time as demonstration of their Father working hard at school to further his education and make himself a more whole person. I fear that young minds would interpret my time as lots of lazy screen time wasted on an internet machine. I do think about the amount of time school has also taken me away from Lara and how my personal goal effects our marriage, but I feel we've communicated well so our relationship has never been a concern. I thank Lara and love her for the space and support, but the point of this NTM is our children's growth.
My Mother moved away from Dad and I for two years while she went to Billings to complete her Bachelor's Degree in Education. I was in 8th and 9th grades at the time and didn't think much of it. Dad and I ate lots of TV dinners and steak. Plus, Kathleen, Jed, and Carley lived with us for one of the years and I was deep into school sports so there was a lot going on. As a kid, I sort of didn't notice that Mom was gone. But, as an adult I recognized how hard that must have been for her to be away from family to complete a personal goal. Looking back, I think her example showed me that it's never to late in life to chase a dream (sounds corny, eh).
I've tried my best to maintain normalcy. Breakfast with the kids gives me a nice start to the day and dinner with the whole family is very important to all of us. I'm bless to have had jobs that allowed me the flexibility to make this work and a wife who shares the same values. Dedicating time to "go to school" and time to be with family keeps me organized. I have awoken early and stayed up late to do school work. I have taken vacation days and worked through the weekend in an effort to not let school consume my life, even as it consumes most of my waking thoughts.
I have learned a lot in these 4 years and am very happy to have spend the money, time, and effort to be successful. But, I do hope, one day, Reed and Amy can look back and see Dad as a positive example of a crazy, disciplined, and hard worker for completing this degree in the middle of raising and family.
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