Reed and public speaking

As I've written before, Reed has a little bit of anxiety talking in front of the class at school - mostly around the Socratic Seminar when it's really unstructured.

On Wednesday morning, he got up early and said he didn't want to go to school. He had to do an oral book report. He reluctantly faced his fate and I worried about him – one day perhaps he'll have a kid and he'll understand how much a Mom wishes she could take away any difficult thing her child has to go through.

Since he has a new teacher in this class (the regular teacher went on maternity leave, we'd been working with the long-term sub, but now he's got a permanent replacement teacher). We hadn't interacted with her at all, though. I panicked a little bit and just sent her a quick heads up email to just say that Reed had struggled a bit with this kind of thing, so she'd be aware. She was really great and said she'd keep an eye on him and do her best to make him comfortable.

Then a little later, I got this email....

And he did an outstanding job on his speech! The class laughed at his explanation of his map-stealer grabbing the maps from Harvard and Yale. His was one of the better ones. I could tell he was nervous, but he fought through was very successful! I was so proud especially knowing about his anxiety!  Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do for Reed – he is such a nice young man, and I enjoy having him in class.

YAHOO!! What a great note to get, all-around. We feel like we're raising a pretty good kid, but it's always nice to get this kind of confirmation from other people. Reed also said he thought it went pretty well, and wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. He was pretty worried about it, since it was his first time having to do something like that in high school – we tried to tell him it wasn't really different than middle school, it's all the same kids – but when you're anxious, you're anxious. I'm so proud that he did well!

Maybe we're making some progress!

Women's March 2018

This year, Amy decided she'd go with me to the Women's March in DC. Last year, I didn't really try to get her to go, because I was concerned – totally unnecessarily, it turns out – that safety might be an issue. In hindsight, I wish I'd brought her then. But she also wasn't as socially engaged as she is now, so I'm not sure she would have been into it.

But she's become a lot more interested in social issues now (boy, don't get her started! you won't heard the end of it! – in a good way) so she was on board this time. It helped that the weather was going to be ideal – high 50s. Can't ask for more for late January in DC.

The night before, we each made our own signs. The 'theme' this year was voting rights, so I went with that. Amy found a Wonder Woman quote online and it was perfect!

We went with Liz, who is the Chair of our Dulles District Democrats. Last year the walk was SO crazy crowded, so far beyond what anybody expected, but this year we knew there'd be fewer of us – we just weren't sure how much smaller the crowd would be. We just hoped we wouldn't be the only 3 people there! We got into the city with zero traffic, parked and started walking over to the Lincoln Memorial, where the speeches would be. There were almost zero people on the streets. But it was early, and the crowd turned out to be pretty decent.

The march makes for great people watching, and the creativity people show with their signs is pretty wild. One difference this year (other than the smaller crowd) is that there were anti-abortion protesters there this time...mostly men, too (which didn't go unnoticed by Amy). They weren't disruptive or anything, it just added a different dimension to things.

Unfortunately it turned out that Liz had a friend there, and she was sitting on a wall to the side of the stage, and Liz wanted to hang out with her. I so wish I'd been more assertive and moved Amy and me over in front of the stage, so that we might have heard anything the speakers had to say. As it was, we were basically just standing around for 3+ hours of speakers who we couldn't really see and who sounded like the adults on Charlie Brown. Womp womp. Because the government shutdown (#TrumpShutdown – happy first anniversary as POTUS!), extra Congresspeople showed up, and you know if they show up you have to let them talk. The speakers went on SO much longer than they should have - eventually people just started wandering away. We followed, hoping that they knew what the march route was supposed to be (because we didn't...it wasn't the most organized of events).

The march itself was actually really short – seemed like just a handful of blocks. There were chants – some of which I opted out of (I don't like the ones that call 45 ugly or are otherwise disparaging in an excessive way). I think the thing that made the biggest impression on Amy was when the chant "My body, my choice" started and the men chanted "Her body, her choice" in response. Totally organic moment. The march ended by the back of the White House.

Amy hated the standing around endlessly, which is why I'm even more irritated at myself that we didn't move to a spot where we could hear the speakers. But overall she said she loved it, and was really glad she went.

I have a feeling it won't be her last protest march. I told Tod that we should probably keep a little bucket of money to bail her out of jail for protesting...seems like that might happen one day. As Congressman and civil rights leader John Lewis says....#GoodTrouble.

On the ride home, Amy also shared some things that've happened to her at lunch. A boy that she used to be great pals with in elementary school sits with her group some days. Evidently he sometimes calls people the r-word, and Amy has stood up to him and told him that's not okay (VERY proud of her for that). He laughed it off. The same boy has also asked her if she was 'triggered' by that comment – man, where is that kid getting that stuff? He also asked her if she was an SJW – she wasn't totally sure what that was, but it's a right-wing 'insult' to call people Social Justice Warriors if they are active to help causes that help people. (Not much of an insult, is it??) Amy wasn't sure how, or if, she should respond to something like that. I told her she could just ignore it, or she could tell him "Yes, you're right, I am a SJW and I stand up for things and people that I believe in!" We'll see if it comes up again. I was glad she told me about it.

Amy also said that she wished there was something she could do to help. So I'll see if we can find more ways for her to get involved. I'm hoping that the Young Democrats club at the high school will be up and running by the time she gets there – that'd be a great fit for her!

Reed the cook

Last summer Reed did a lot of baking. This fall he has shown an interest in making dinner in the evenings. This is helping his confidence and is a fun thing that he and his Mom do together. As a Freshman in High School it's funny to see him trying to cook while wearing his headphones and getting distracted by his phone. It's interesting to see him learning to cook since he doesn't seem altogether interested in learning to cook, he just sort of goes along with what Mom tells him to do, but he can't help himself in contradicting his Mom. "I can't touch the cheese grater, it has sharpies on it!" I love it when he helps cook dinner due to the friendly banter that comes out of the kitchen.

I remember being his age and asking for help with things. Then when I realized I was wrong I sort of played dumber and dumber. He does the exact same thing. Mom shows him how to take apart the spinning cheese grater and he sort of grabs it even more incorrectly and plays dumb. I don't think he knows he's doing it. Funny.

It must be noted (by Mom) that he pretty much only offers to make dinner on odd days, because that means he won't have to do the dishes after. Not sure it's a fair trade, but we'll take it. Hopefully some of the things he's learning are sinking in.